Wishing and Hoping....

Remember the movie My Best Friends Wedding? And the theme song, Wishin' and Hopin'. I love me a good Julia Roberts chick-flick. Hoping for her to get her true love. Despite what she might think or believe.

Today, this became a new reality for me. Not getting my true love, (I already have that). Rather understanding hope. There are so many things I hope for. And quite honestly it frustrates me to no end when people, especially those that I love, discard my hopes and dreams. When they tell me I don't understand reality. Well truth be told, I don't. And today I realized that is ok.

When everything was hopeless, Abraham believed anyway, deciding to live not on the basis of what he saw he couldn't do but on what God said he would do. And so he was made father of a multitude of peoples. God himself said to him, "You're going to have a big family, Abraham!" (Romans 4:18 MSG)

I love Abraham. And Sarah.

• Their FAITH.
• Their HOPE.

Believing God for a child helped me to understand and them more than if I hadn't struggled with infertility. And today I love their hope.

• When it seems hopeless, God tells me to hope.
• When it seems impossible, God tells me it's possible.
• When it seems like there is not even a breath left in me, God says to prophesy to the dry bones for new breath.

The end result? A father to a multitude of people..
For me? HOPE renewed.

And soon my multitude..... But until then, I'm keeping my head in the clouds - full of hope - a little out of anyone's reality except God. After all, that is all that matters anyways.

So keep hoping. I'm right here with you!

With love,
 Tammy

Sometimes its just the little things....

Sometimes its the little things that can make your day....

Like this custom address stamp I had made from Lindsey at Twelve6Design.com.

Really, isn't it adorable?

It is a little thing... but it brings a smile to my face.

No more using the cheesy address stamps that get mailed to you "free" when  you donate to a cause.

No more hand writing your return.

Mailing bills doesn't seem so dreary.

Wouldn't you love to get a little note or letter in the mail with an address stamp like this?

It's the little details in life that make the difference.

Like when you make Mickey Mouse pancakes instead of plain, boring circles.  Somehow they just taste better.

Or when you have designer napkins at dinner instead of the economy white ones.

Or when you make your own french press coffee and put it in your favorite mug - it just tastes more wonderful.

Little Things.

Tiny Things.

The things that make it your own.

What is your little thing?  I'd love to hear about it!

with love,
Tammy

Getting schooled

Tonight I got a lesson in forgiveness from my son. No, this is not what you are probably thinking - a sweet little boy forgiving me for my lack of mommy-ness.

Rather about NOT forgiving.

Yes my son got in trouble.

We had the usual mommy/son talk about why this behavior was not good and how it hurts us and God's heart when we disobey. Then we got to the part where we ask for forgiveness and that is when the waterworks started.

"I'm not crying mommy because of ....(his act do disobedience), I'm crying because ..... "  And he begins to list all these things that happened over the last few days. He got hit at school with a toy. His Nanny wouldn't let him do something. He didn't get to play long enough. Never wanting to ask for forgiveness himself. His own hurt outweighed anything else.

Finally after minutes of crying, and me rubbing his back helping him get some control, he just falls asleep.

Now for the lesson:

What I realized is that many times I'm just like this. God is trying to show me where I sinned and instead of simply repenting and asking for forgiveness I bring up all my own hurts. Can't God see me crying? Can't he see how much it hurt me for all these things to happen?

But God tells us this:

In prayer there is a connection between what God does and what you do. You can't get forgiveness from God, for instance, without also forgiving others. (Matthew 6:14 MSG) 

What is keeping me from asking for forgiveness is the own unforgiveness in my own heart.  When I don't truly forgive, all the things from the past come up and get in the way of what God is trying to do now in the present.  Ouch! This mommy just got schooled.

Sometimes in these instances, after much crying myself, I just fall asleep too.  Maybe those are the times when God is just rubbing my back, knowing that the life lesson is massaging deep into my soul.   Then peace - sleep.

Yes, Jarrett learned about forgiveness tonight, but so did I.  Now, time for bed :)

with love,
tammy

And..... I'm back

I've been gone... Have you noticed?

 Being an accountant, this is my crazy year end schedule at work.  BUT----January is almost over and my crazy year end work schedule is just about done. Yea!  

 Time for a happy dance! 

 I haven't had much time for anything. And I've missed a lot. 
 Missed all of the reorganizing that I see so many pinning on Pinterest. Pantries, closets, desks and drawers. All fresh and clean and one day I'll be there too. 

I've missed the crafting, the New Year's Resolutions, the snow days being bundled up and cozy by the fire with a good book.

But the thing I missed the most was my Family.

• Missed family nights. 
• Missed goodnight stories. 
• Missed bath time.  

 So for me, cupboards and pantries can wait a bit longer. The thing I long for most of all is cuddle time with the people who mean the most to me. 

Why is it when the pressure is on its these that you love the most that are the first to get snapped at, the first you lose your patience with, the first to get the short end of the stick.  While I'm ashamed that this is true, it reminds me that God has an answer for everything-even how I SHOULD behave when the pressure is on.

 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends... So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love. (1 Corinthians 13:4-8, 13 ESV) 

• Was I patient? Doubt it. 
• Kind? Not always.
• Rude? More then likely. 

 But, "love never ends". Today is a new day. By the grace of God I have a new day to show love like Christ teaches me to. Thank you Lord for this lesson.

with love,
Tammy

just feeling a little CANDID....

Happy New Year!

It's January 4th.  I know it's late, but truth be told I have been struggling with this post for quite some time.  You see I had hopes of writing a lovely, INSPIRING post right before the end of 2011.  With all of the incredible things that happened in the year tied together with a heart warming revelation on SOMETHING.

That didn't happen.

Then, I thought I'd redeem myself with a post to start out the new year with GREAT INSPIRATION - challenging myself and others to be a better mom, a better wife, a better person.

That didn't happen.


As a blogger, (if I can even call myself that), I really felt in the past few weeks I've had nothing to say.  Instead, I've just been living life.  The holidays.  My family.

But then I thought, That is what blogging is all about - at least my blog.

To record my life.

Just like this old picture of me as a little girl (circa 197? - courtesy of my Aunt/Uncle).  I love this picture.  Just a tiny clip.  But to me, it says so much.  I remember this trunk.  And I love the expression of joy on my face.  What was I looking at?  who knows.  Probably my parents.  Or someone just being silly.

And I realized that pictures can speak more than I can most times.

That is why I love them - especially candids.  It tells the story of my life.  Tells the story of my son's life.

Like when we went to the pumpkin patch.....   I love his crazy expressions of happiness too.  Like sometimes when he is almost embarrassed at how excited he is.


Or his superhero birthday....  Where their mission was to battle the bad guys and rescue the stuffed animals....

Along with precious moments, like his 1st day of Preschool....curly hair and all...

or Easter - having fun with his cousin waiting for the egg hunt to begin...

                                       

So it's these times that aren't planned, that are captured in the moment, that inspire me.

What an amazing gift I have being a parent.  It's not easy - some days are really challenging.  But I wouldn't trade it for the world.

Without it, Easter egg hunts, pumpkin patches, birthday parties and 1st days of school would all be just a fleeting memory.  Maybe captured in old film of some sort.

But with it.....a LIFE!  my life.

One that I am forever grateful to God that He blessed me with.

MY MIRACLE.

with love,
Tammy