Wednesday, December 19, 2012

untold stories....and Peace

For days now, I have been wanting to write.  There are so many stories of our life that I want to share, want to get in before the year is through.  


The beautiful birth of my nephew, Jonah.  

The fun box car parade for Jarrett's 5th birthday.  

Fall at Bill's Berry Farm, getting pumpkins, making hand pressed apple cider, and taking a ride on the farm animal train.

My brother's wedding on the beach

Taking Jarrett to Disneyland - a dream come true

Sewing handmade stockings

Having fun with Lucy, our Elf on the Shelf 

And yet, every time I sit at the computer, or stop to think about what I am going to say, the tears from my heart crest to the surface.  And I walk away.  I can't write.  I'm giving a moment of blogger silence not out of respect, (although I sincerely do), but out of I can't put into words anything worthy of all that has happened.  All I can think of is the countless stories that the children and families of Sandy Hook will never get the opportunity to tell.

There is no way to put into words the horrific tragedy at Sandy Hook.  While I didn't personally know any of the children, teachers or their families, I do feel like I know each and every one.  I see the little five year olds in the eyes of my own five year old.  And my heart aches for them.  And their moms.  And their dads, siblings, grandparents, friends.  The ones that were lost as well as the ones that were spared - who will for the rest of their precious life be affected by this act of evil, save the grace of God.

On Friday, I was at work, listening to the news as I was working.  Tears in my eyes, working away - my job had to go on as if nothing was happening.  But something was.  And it was terrible.  I can't pretend otherwise.

All I could do is get home to my son as soon as I could and hold him tighter.  Pray harder.  Love better.

In the history of humanity, there have been so many tragedies.  Lives cut short.  Pain that we inflicted upon ourselves.  Why?  Why do we do this?  

Driving on the way home from my Connect Group (bible study) tonight, I heard God speak to me plain as day.

"Be still, and know that I am God."

While this little verse in Psalms 46 is SMALL in words, it's LARGE in power.

My stress and worry about sending my son to school, my heartache for the families who lost loved ones, while I still don't understand the "why", I know that I can focus on "Who".

"Be still...." - quit fretting, worrying, questioning, doubting, etc.  Be quiet - so I can hear HIM.

"....know that I am God" - be confident that regardless of what happens here on earth, God is still on the throne and nothing will every change that.  Politics won't change that, people won't change that, tragedy won't change that, even Satan can't change that.  

I have been stressing, worrying, saddened, heartbroken at times.  But God was letting me know to stop and be still from all of that, He is still in control.  And with that comes peace.

I needed that.

After all, this Christmas season, which I love more than any time of year is about His perfect peace, manifested in God's Son, sent to each one of us as a gift.

"For unto us a child is born, unto us a Son is given.  And the government shall be upon His shoulders.  And His name shall be called, Wonderful, Counselor, The Mighty God, The Everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace."    - Isaiah 9:6
with love,
Mommy Tam-Tam

No comments:

Post a Comment

Thanks for stopping by....I'd love to hear from you.